What You Need To Know About Dating, With Nicole Bessick

The holidays are abound, get your dating game strong.


Nadim Nyker |

The holidays are abound, that means it’s time to get your dating game strong. Whether it’s on the beach or at the bar, your chances of meeting someone are tenfold. Getting her number is the easy part; but keeping up that A game? That’s real challenge. Luckily for you, we spoke to actress and pro boxer Nicole Bessick, who gave us some pro tips on dating.

The 25-year-old is best known for her work as Chloe on the ETV telenovela, Broken Vows. She’s also a boxing enthusiast, as Africa’s First Female Celebrity Boxing Champion, she’s also known as Action Barbie by many. She answered some of our most pressing questions. Learn from her.

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What do women really want when it comes to “dating”? 

“Take your dad’s advice when it comes to chivalry and how to woo the opposite sex,” she says. “Women of the world have undergone ridiculous changes in mentality and these days are able to finance, fuel and treat themselves.

“Essentially, we’re becoming the men we once wanted to marry. What all women want is chivalry. Chivalry will open up doors the best pickup lines cannot.”

Related: What You Need To Know To Date Lorna Maseko

What is the perfect date? Does it even exist?

“Every woman is different. Show her what YOUR idea of a fun time is. It will offer her insight into what spending time with you would be like should the two of you decide to make it a more permanent thing.”

Are women really impressed by the glitz and glam?

“For me, it’s not about the ‘glitz and glam,’ but it IS about the amount of thought and effort a man puts in. I appreciate a romantic, well-planned night in far more than I care for an expensive dinner at a fancy restaurant.”

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“You’re not in my league” – how should a guy deal with this?

“Absolutely not. You don’t need to tolerate that kind arrogance, gents. Keep it moving, you’re dodging a bullet.”

Technology. The biggest relationship breaker. How do couples find balance?

“Technology really can make or break a relationship – especially a long distance one. For me, I rely on my cellphone more heavily when travelling and trying to stay in touch, but when we’re together, I’m hardly on it and try and be present in each moment.”

Biggest turnoff/dealbreaker?

“Scrubs,” Nicole says, referencing the popular TLC song (look it up). “To the left, to the left!”

Help a guy out…. how do two people maintain independence but successfully come together as a couple?

“When you’re attracted to someone and in the midst of that honeymoon phase, you want to spend as much time together as possible. It’s natural! In order to avoid co-dependency, I think it’s important for people to know who they are and what they stand for as an individual, not just as someones boyfriend or girlfriend,” she notes.

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“More importantly, invest in ‘me time’ and be present in every moment thereof: gym time, your favourite hobby, whatever it may be. Not only will it nurture your personal growth, but it will give you so much more to talk about and share with your partner when you see them again.”

Do women expect a man to formally ask her to be his girlfriend – is that still a thing?

“Absolutely! Men, remember this!”

Women can pursue a guy just as much as a guy can pursue a woman? 

“There’s nothing wrong with unapologetically expressing interest in someone you’re feeling… but I’m a very prideful woman, the first move should always be his!”

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