Step Up Your Game, Gents: The Women You Have Sex With Are Having Way Fewer Orgasms Than Anybody Else

Kirsten Curtis |

It’s probably time to step up your game in bed

A depressing new study published in the Archives of Sexual Behaviour suggests that straight women are having fewer orgasms during sex with their partners than anyone else.

The study, which was a collaborative effort among Chapman University, Indiana University, and the Kinsey Institute, surveyed 52,588 adults on their sexual habits. The respondents included 26,032 straight men, 24,102 straight women, 452 gay men, 550 bisexual men, 340 lesbian women, and 112 bisexual women.

Among the men, there wasn’t much of a disparity. Straight men reported having the most orgasms, with 95 percent saying that they “usually or always” had an orgasm during sex. 89 percent of gay men reported “usually or always” having an orgasm, while 88 percent of bisexual men reported the same.

However, when it came to the women, the responses differed dramatically: Lesbian women reported having an orgasm 86 percent of the time. On the other hand, straight women and bisexual women reported only achieving orgasm 65 and 66 percent of the time, respectively.

So what’s to blame for this big orgasm gap? Researchers aren’t entirely sure, but there could be a few reasons: The authors of the study posited that lesbian women, for example, are more likely to have a better understanding of the female anatomy and clitoral stimulation than their straight counterparts. They also suggested that lesbians are better at taking turns with their partners to please each other than straight men are (you don’t say).

The researchers also found that the women who did orgasm more frequently were more likely to “engage in oral sex, ask for what they want in bed, be satisfied with their relationship, wear lingerie, try new sexual positions, try anal sex, incorporate dirty/sexy talk, and express love during sex” than their counterparts. That makes sense — a lot of women aren’t comfortable asking for what they want in bed, so it stands to reason that women who are will have more orgasms.

Another finding: The biggest predictor of how often a woman orgasmed was whether she received oral sex. “Women who orgasmed more frequently reported receiving more oral sex, having sex for longer durations, and being more satisfied with their relationships,” the researchers write. “Of particular importance for women was incorporating oral sex along with other activities during a sexual encounter.”

But the biggest takeaway from the study? Turns out, the “elusive female orgasm” might not be so elusive after all. The fact that so many lesbian women enjoyed orgasms regularly during sex suggests that straight women could enjoy more as well. In fact, the study authors stress that the orgasm gap could probably be eliminated by addressing sociocultural factors and by encouraging a wider variety of activities when men and women are sexually intimate.” In other words, if you suspect your girlfriend’s faking it or she’s flat-out told you she’s not climaxing during sex, this is a totally solvable problem.

Bottom line? If you’re a straight man, it’s probably worth checking in with your girlfriend or wife to see how she’s feeling about the state of your sex life. Even if things are good, it could be a fun opportunity for the two of you to experiment with something new. And really, what’s the downside to having more orgasms?

READ MORE ON: Orgasm Sex

Copyright © 2021 Rodale Inc.
Subscribe for notification