By MH Staff - Posted on 13th January 2014
Beware: this sexual lifestyle comes with strict guidelines. Ignore them, and you’re just an idiot who’s sleeping around.
Openly sharing fantasies, a willingness to experiment and discussing other people you’re attracted to are all signs that a woman is open to persuasion. But you need to tread carefully. Ask her, “How about a different kind of arrangement?” Follow the question up with a direct, sensitive explanation.
Polyamory can be a solution to incompatibilities in the bedroom. Be sure to state exactly what you’re after. Say, “My dungeon fantasy – I know you don’t enjoy it, so I’ve been thinking…” Be prepared for her to respond in kind: if you’re having sex with other people, so can she. That’s the deal.
Jealousy takes time to unlearn. Speak with each other often to assuage your partner’s insecurities, such as dating someone younger. You may find you need to renegotiate terms, be that the number of partners or how often you see them. Speak up when issues arise or forever be ill at ease.
Be realistic about how many partners you can logistically satisfy, and be sure to factor in time for friends, family, hobbies – even the odd spot of work. It’s better to start with two and factor more in when it feels comfortable, than attempt hapless woman-juggling from the get-go.
Some things are best kept to yourself. Recounting in explicit detail your sexual liaisons with other partners, or drawing attention to their differences (“That’s not how Sarah does it”) is the quickest way to make everyone involved feel insecure and can lead to resentment. Don’t do it. Ever.