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Talk it out, people. During sex, many women are hesitant to ask for clitoral stimulation or to stimulate themselves, although men would love both options. In a Canadian study, men in a male-only focus group had an “extremely positive” reaction to the idea of a woman asking for stimulation or touching herself. But in their own focus group, women said they feared hurting the guy’s self-esteem, says author Dr Claire M.A. Salisbury. The fix: encourage her!