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Why do guys want to sleep after sex, while women want to cuddle?
Two factors are intimately involved here: our reasons for having sex and the typical climax. Neurologically speaking, orgasm is similar in men and women, so there’s no hormonal explanation for your desire to doze and her craving for spooning, says Dr John Bancroft, a senior researcher at the Kinsey Institute. “However, women are more variable than men in their motives for engaging in sex. In men it’s usually for sexual pleasure. This is sometimes true for women, but other psychological factors play a larger role.” In fact, 83% of women in a recent study in Hormones and Behavior reported that “feeling emotionally close to a partner” was “very or extremely important” for their sexual happiness, while only 29% of them selected “to have an orgasm.” The other reason you might be spent while she’s still spunky, notes Dr Bancroft, is the orgasm gap. “About 30% of women always reach orgasm during sex, compared with 85% of men.” To increase your odds of synchronised sleep, try giving her a clench-the sheets moment before penetration, or use the coital alignment technique, which gives women a 56% better shot at having an orgasm during sex.