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  • Down Town

    Sex advice for the modern man


    • Dr Tanya Robinson is author of the book "When Sex Turns Sour" and is in private practice as a sexual health practitioner.

    What is the best lube to use?

    It is really essential for good health and hygiene to use only lubricants that have been specifically designed for that application. Remember, whatever you use externally will end up internally as well. Using the wrong products, like face or body creams, baby oils, petroleum jellies and so on can cause serious infection. It’s best to use water-based lubrication as it works well with condoms. Astroglide, KY Jelly and all other water-based lubes enhance sexual pleasure and help women with vaginal dryness that can lead to sexual discomfort.

    I’ve heard that the sex position during conception can dictate the sex of the baby. Is this true?

    There are a lot of old wives’ tales about sexual positions influencing your baby’s gender. It’s suggested that if you want a boy, your lady should remain lying down after sex, supposedly to give the boy sperm a chance to beat the girl sperm to the egg. For a boy, they say, make love standing up or try entering from behind, but for a girl, give missionary or girl-on-top a go. If she orgasms before you, decorate your nursery pink. In my opinion, these theories aren’t the determining factor in gender selection.

    I’m a morning person and my wife’s a night owl. How do we prevent our sex life suffering?

    A couple’s healthy sexual intercourse is all about compromise. You and your wife should focus on trying to meet the other’s needs, rather than focusing purely on your own. Then it’s win-win. Plan something special and be flexible in accommodating your partner. Try afternoon sex over weekends – a time slot where you’re both awake, relaxed and ready to please one other. Time constraints and incompatibility can become quite frustrating when initiating sex, but it’s important to work around this and find creative ways to be intimate. Wake up in the middle of the night once a week to have sex at a totally different time to help create a different sexual routine. Making things fun and spontaneous again will get you out of a sexual-routine rut.

    Archives

    • My girlfriend is a virgin. We’ve discussed having sex, but I’m scared of hurting her.
    • Is there a chance that the Pill will affect her sex drive?
    • Do novelty condoms really add to performance and pleasure levels?
    • Will living together kill our sex life?
    • How do I deal with my unforgiving girlfriend?
    • How do I encourage my wife to take control in bed?
    • Should I be worried how many guys she's slept with?
    • How do I tell my wife I'm unhappy when she discusses our sex life with others?
    • How do we have sex in public without being caught?
    • How can I convince my lover to leave the lights on?

    *Men's Health does not give out contact information for experts featured in our magazine or on our web site, and queries addressed to these individuals cannot be forwarded on your behalf. If you require professional health and lifestyle advice, we strongly recommend that you contact your local service providers.


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